zara_zee: (Zara_zee)
[personal profile] zara_zee
So episode 11.02 made me think more thinky thoughts and I am very keen to see episode three because it feels very much like last season, that the opening gambit is sort of a three ep arc.

Firstly, kudos to [livejournal.com profile] indiachick for correctly predicting the fire solution! I may have bemused my son by shouting Ha! Indiachick picked that! at my TV screen. :\

I really enjoyed smart!Sam and I'm interested in the Crowley/demons story line, and what's going on in the cage...especially given that Sam seemed to be having cage flashbacks. I have to say though, that the angel storyline didn't interest me at all this week. And that's a shame because with the Darkness coming back into the world, there's potential for the angels to become interesting again, provided they can integrate them back into the main storyline properly. Holding out hope for that to start happening next episode.

This week's coda is shamelessly self-indulgent, in that I wanted the brotherly talk that we didn't get, and it's also a wee bit speculative, in that I throw out some wacky theories because I'm intrigued and finding it fun to speculate!

--

Title: Let there be light
Author: [livejournal.com profile] zara_zee
Beta: Not beta’d
Genre(s): Episode coda
Rating: PG-13, Gen
Spoilers:  Episode 11.02
Word Count: ~1,550
Disclaimer: Not mine, just playing in the sand box.

Summary: “In the interests of full disclosure,” Sam says, “For a while back there, I was infected.”

--

There were less than 2,000 people living in Superior before the Darkness.

Half of them are bloated corpses lying bloody in the streets now. The rest are standing clench-fisted on Superior High School’s football field, their swollen veins black and throbbing, their teeth bared.

Sam and his team of The Cured (almost, but not quite a rock band, Sam thinks with a half-smile) are standing at the field’s far end, waiting.

Eye of the Tiger is blasting from the drama department’s portable stereo, amplified by the metal-bucket speakers that Sam has jerry-rigged.

Sam taps his foot and hums along:

Risin' up, back on the street; Did my time, took my chances; Went the distance; Now I'm back on my feet; Just a man and his will to survive…

“You think that’s everyone?” he wonders out loud.

It’s Melissa who answers. The football field was her idea. She teaches here.

“Could be,” she says. “Don’t know for sure who all are dead.”

“Okay,” Sam says. He strikes a match and drops it on the ground. “Go Wildcats.”

The large thin circle of holy oil catches fire and the infected stare and frown and then collapse, shaking and shuddering and clutching at their necks.

Sam sincerely hopes that they’ve got everyone; the circle took every last drop of the holy oil.



Sam is helping to carry bodies to a make-shift morgue when he hears the tell-tale rumble of the Impala. He sighs and stands up straight.

Melissa tilts her head and looks at him with raised eyebrows and pursed lips.

“My partner,” he says.

She nods.

Nobody asked to see his ID when he told them he was Agent Sam Clapton from the CDC. Nobody asked questions when he stuttered an explanation for the events of the last couple of days that involved a twister hitting Superior at the same time that a truckload of recently delivered loaves of bread made with contaminated flour gave everyone ergot poisoning.

He’s pretty sure everybody knew he was lying. But everybody just nodded and set to cleaning up and avoided each other’s eyes.

“I have to get back to Headquarters,” Sam says to Melissa when the Impala glides to a stop. He opens the passenger-side door and slides inside before Dean has time to get out of the car.

“Let’s go,” he tells his brother.

Dean frowns. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Sam huffs out a laugh. “Just, uh, don’t really wanna stick around for the post-match, post-mortem. You know?”

Dean doesn’t say anything, just runs sharp, assessing eyes over Sam and then re-starts the engine and takes off.

There’s an ACDC album playing—Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, if Sam’s not mistaken and given how well he knows Dean’s cassette collection, he’s not—and they let it run through twice without speaking. Sam’s exhausted and his thoughts are a jumbled mess of darkness and empty voids and impure blood.

Dean punches the tape out when it starts its third re-run and puts on Houses of the Holy.  It’s not until he turns onto the I-70 that he finally turns to Sam and says, “I get you not wanting to go through a play-by-play with the townsfolk, but are you at least gonna tell me how the game went?”

Sam stares down at the frayed hems of his jeans, recalls telling Dean earlier that the two of them had to change; that they had to make sure they didn’t just keep repeating the same old mistakes.

The thing is though, Dean has a history of taking decisions out of Sam’s hands and Sam needed to keep a tight rein on the life-and-death decisions this time around. He’s a man of action, just like his brother, it’s just that his actions tend to be better thought out; more carefully researched. Which doesn’t actually stop him from fucking things up as badly as Dean. Case-in-point, the release of the Darkness. Still, Sam honestly doesn’t want them repeating the same old mistakes, so he turns to face his brother.

“In the interests of full disclosure,” he says, “For a while back there, I was infected.”

The muscles in Dean’s jaw clench and release. Sam braces himself for an explosion of anger.

“You’re cured now, though, right?” Dean says.

“Yeah. Me and everybody still alive in that town. I purified our blood with holy fire.”

“Ouch,” Dean turns to stare at him. “How the hell did you do that without ending up deep fried and crispy?”

Sam explains the process and when Dean asks what made him come up with the idea, he finds himself explaining about Billie-the-reaper and what she told him.

Dean rubs a hand across his chin. “Do you think it’s a little weird that Death can die, but Death dying doesn’t stop death dead in its tracks?” he frowns. “That sentence made sense in my head.”

Sam shrugs. “Maybe Death’s like the Dalai Lama,” he says, “and when he dies, he gets re-incarnated?”

Dean’s eyes light up. “Or he regenerates. Like, the Death I killed was David Tennant and now we get Matt Smith,” his eyes widen. “Maybe Billie is actually the New Death? There’s no reason he couldn’t regenerate into a woman, right?”

Sam snorts. And Dean says he’s a geek. “If she is, then you and I are definitely gonna be spending the afterlife in ‘the Empty’.”

“What the hell is that?” Dean says.

“What does it sound like?” Sam snarks. “Does it sound like a good thing?”

 Dean raises an eyebrow and then looks away. “Touché.”

“Actually,” Sam leans back in his seat, “I wouldn’t mind spending a few decades in the Empty. I could do with a rest.”

“You should try to get some sleep,” Dean ventures. “It’s been a long-ass few days.”

Sam finds that he can’t close his eyes.

He turns and sees Dean looking at him. “I could find us a motel,” Dean says. “Get you your own room.”

That’s not the problem. Sam trusts Dean with his life. Even with the Mark of Cain on his arm and Death urging him on, Dean couldn’t take his brother’s life. Sam doubts he’s going to stab him now. It’s just that he can’t stop thinking. Was that Hell flashback a sign from God or courtesy of the Darkness in his veins? Is Death dead? Is Billie Death? Where’s Rowena? What’s going on with Cas? Why is the Darkness a woman? Where is the Empty?

“Sam? You want me to find a motel?”

“Nah, I’m good,” Sam stretches. “I’m deliriously tired, but my brain won’t shut down.”

And besides, it actually feels good to be sitting beside Dean in the car, music playing, exhausted, but high on adrenaline from their latest hunt. It’s the most normal Sam has felt in a while. He dozes for an indeterminate amount of time, neither asleep nor completely awake, his brain stumbling from thought to thought, almost dreaming.

Sam’s brain can get pretty philosophical when he’s deliriously tired and he finds himself thinking about Genesis; about Creation; about Hebrew translations. The Earth was formless and void is significantly different to the Earth became formless and void.  Before God had a chance to say ‘Let there be light’ did some kind of destructive act turn the Earth into an uninhabitable ruin, which God then had to fix? And given that the verse continues with darkness was upon the face of the deep, was that act done by the Darkness?

According to Death, God imprisoned the Darkness in the Void. Is that the same as the Empty?

Sam sits up straight, his mind whirling.

“What?” Dean says, eyes wide and startled.

“Time and space,” Sam says. “Is time linear or circular? It could be either; there are philosophical arguments for both and Dean…what if it’s circular?”

Dean frowns. “Is this about Dr Who?”

Sam huffs. “No, Dean, it’s about us. The reapers or the New Death or whoever, want to send us to the Empty when we die and I just had this really fucked up thought. What if we end up like angry spirits? God knows we’ve both got enough darkness inside us already, but what if the Empty warps our souls? And what if the Empty where we go and the Void where the Darkness just came from are the same place? And if time is circular, what if…what if we are the Darkness?”

Dean inclines his head. “But the Darkness is a chick. At least she was, she’s a baby girl now,” he pulls up outside the bunker. “Not gonna put her in the garage,” he says, patting the Impala’s steering wheel, “she needs a good wash after all that mud.”

“Wait a minute,” says Sam. “The Darkness is a baby?”

Dean launches into an explanation about Crowley and altar boys and a tiny baby mark of Cain as they collect their bags and leave the car.



The bunker's a mess and Dean makes some lame-ass quip about needing a maid, because he's still mulling over what Sam said in the car and, while he'd never believe it of Sammy, it wouldn't surprise him in the slightest to learn that he was destined to become a horribly destructive amoral force.

Deep down, Dean has always suspected that there was nothing inside him but darkness.
--

Date: 2015-10-18 02:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] borgmama1of5.livejournal.com
I really wonder if Sam told Dean 'the whole truth' about what happened and how Dean would react...I could see it happening like you wrote!

Also LOVE how you had Sam do a mass cure of the infected--that was a brilliant as Sam was throughout the whole episode!

Dean's speculation on Death was great...but I don't like the idea Sam came up with and Dean's last line is so sadly Dean...

Date: 2015-10-18 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
It's a very long drive from Superior to Lebanon so I figure they must have talked on the way! I guess we'll found out how honest they've been with each other in the next few episodes, but until then we can fill in the gaps the way we want! :D

Mass cure seemed the way to go...he didn't have a lot of holy oil! And the season thus far is ripe for speculation, what with a pre-Creation baddie and this mysterious new 'empty'. I very much doubt that Sam's delirious speculation is accurate...but it does rather fascinate me that the reapers are threatening to send Sam and Dean to (what sounds like it might be) the same place the Darkness just came from!

Date: 2015-10-18 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] madebyme-x.livejournal.com
Oh, this is fascinating! So many thinky thoughts!

I loved the football field and the mass cure of the infected - such a cool idea, that really fits with the show. I loved how you had the boys talk too, it felt natural, and like something we'd see in the infamous 'car-talks' we've seen before.

I loved your idea about Sam and Dean being the darkness, wow, blow my mind why don't you! And Dean's last line is so sad and really packs a punch.

Oh Dean! Oh Sam! What are they doing to us all!?!

Date: 2015-10-18 10:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you!

Mass cure did seem the way to go, given that there was only a small jug of holy oil! And seeing as how the drive back was so long, I don't believe they didn't talk...how honest they were with each other remains to be seen!

As I said in the comment above, I very much doubt that Sam's delirious speculation is accurate...but it does fascinate me that the reapers are threatening to send Sam and Dean to (what sounds like it might be) the same place the Darkness just came from! And speculation is so much fun! :D

Date: 2015-10-18 03:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] freya922.livejournal.com
Ooooooo, VERY intriguing. Love the Dr. Who references, and the terror of the notion of circular time... Also love that the boys are TALKING!

Date: 2015-10-18 10:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Talking is good! And Dr Who references are always fun. :D I'm quite fascinated by 'the Empty'. It's where the Darkness came from and it's where Billie threatened to send the boys. I doubt that Sam's theory is right, but it's fun to speculate! :D

Edition 3,355

Date: 2015-10-19 12:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] livejournal.livejournal.com
User [livejournal.com profile] slytherinblack referenced to your post from Edition 3,355 (http://spnnewsletter.livejournal.com/930453.html) saying: [...] by (PG-13) Let there be light [...]

Date: 2015-10-19 12:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quickreaver.livejournal.com
NICE! And I can totally hear it, see it. Nicely reasoned, too. Oh, Dean. OH DEAN. Baby, you are not just darkness. Ask Sam; he'll tell you.

Date: 2015-10-19 03:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you. I find myself far more intrigued by the Darkness than I expected to be! And Dean...oh Dean...he always finds the bad stuff so much easier to believe than the good.

Date: 2015-10-19 01:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amypond45.livejournal.com
Love this! It feels so well thought-out and in-character! Sam figuring out how to mass-cure the town -- yay Sam! And I couldn't help wonder what they talked about during that long drive. I'm always obsessive about driving distances and in deep dread that the show is going to pretend the drive took them ten minutes so NOTHING was said! How can that happen!? So thank you for "fixing" that non-conversation (I hate it when they keep secrets from each other).

And the Doctor Who references! Yes! Sam would so be into Dr. Who! Thank you for that!

Date: 2015-10-19 03:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
I'm always obsessive about driving distances

This!!! Yes. I'm the same. Like, that drive would've taken ten to twelve hours. Even if they both drove and both napped for some of it, there would've still been plenty of time to talk! And surely SURELY they've learned that keeping secrets never works out well for them by now?

Haha, yes, I can see that someone called "amypond45" would enjoy Dr Who references! ;)

I honestly expected that people wouldn't be able to die at the beginning of this season and when they could, it did make me wonder if you could actually kill Death or if he simply lost one form and regenerated -- or something -- into another one.

Date: 2015-10-19 01:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] safiyabat.livejournal.com
This was a marvelous coda, and I loved the follow-through on the need to change with Sam's full disclosure.

But the ergotism reference filled me with an incredible, indescribable joy.

Date: 2015-10-19 03:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you! I really hope we get some follow-through from the Show's writers on that 'need to change' speech too!

the ergotism reference filled me with an incredible, indescribable joy

I'm glad you got a kick out of that. :D I figure they can't always tell everyone that monsters are real! I'm sure there are numerous times when they have to maintain their cover and stutter out some Men-in-Black type 'marsh gas and light reflecting off of Venus' crap! I like to imagine that Sam has a folder on his laptop full of plausible explanations for various supernatural occurrences!

Date: 2015-10-19 04:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cassiopeia7.livejournal.com
C'mere and let me hug that magnificent brain of yours! I was already thrilled that you wrote THE one scene I needed to see . . . but then came your Supernatural-canon re-interpretation of Genesis, followed by that crazy circular time-space reference that quite simply, blew me away. I mean . . . WOW.

Brilliant, you are. Brava!! \o/

Date: 2015-10-19 06:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you so much! I guess it wasn't so much a re-interpretation as reading Genesis wearing my Supernatural goggles! :D And I do love me a circular time-space conundrum! Highly unlikely to be where Show is going, of course, but it sure is fun to speculate! And the fact that Michael and Lucifer are losing their minds in the cage is quite fascinating too. :D

And yes, I think we ALL needed that scene. I refuse to believe that they could've driven for ten to twelve hours without having a deep and meaningful bro moment in the car! :D

Date: 2015-10-19 07:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anactoria.livejournal.com
Ooh, this is an intriguing idea! I like that you kept us aware they're still dealing with the emotional fallout of 10.23, and Sam telling Dean what happened to him. ♥

Date: 2015-10-19 08:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you. I really do hope that Show does deal with the emotional fallout from 10.23, because there has to be some. I don't like it when they just bury stuff and move on like it's no big deal! :D

Date: 2015-10-19 12:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zubeneschamali.livejournal.com
This was great! So excited that this season is producing so many great episode codas already. I can't believe that Sam wouldn't tell Dean he was infected, for the practical reason of imparting the cure if nothing else, but I love how you did it.

Date: 2015-10-19 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you! Writing my own and reading the other codas is so much fun. It really enhances my enjoyment of the show.

for the practical reason of imparting the cure if nothing else
Yes exactly. Plus it was a ten to twelve hour drive! I don't believe they didn't have some serious conversations during all that time!

Date: 2015-10-19 03:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] killabeez.livejournal.com
Love this so much! Thank you for filling in all the missing pieces, and then some. Great thinky thoughts, and lovely resolution.

Date: 2015-10-19 11:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you! That's the great thing about fanfic, you can just fill in the gaps the way you wanted them to go! :D

Date: 2015-10-19 03:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mamamoggy.livejournal.com
Would be so great to see something like this in an episode. So many times things happen to Sam and they don't discuss them. Thanks for filling in the story.

Date: 2015-10-19 11:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you and you're welcome! Show doesn't always make the same choices many fans would've about what makes it to screen. If it were me, I would've had a talk in the car scene and one less stabbing Castiel scene!

Date: 2015-10-20 07:24 am (UTC)
frozen_delight: (at the bunker)
From: [personal profile] frozen_delight
I so badly wanted Sam and Dean to have this conversation, so I'm incredibly happy you wrote it. And I loved all the speculative touches you added to it, especially Sam's question And if time is circular, what if…what if we are the Darkness? If only this were canon!

Thanks so much for writing and sharing, this was a real treat to read! (And now I kind of hope that all the writers of SPN are reading this too and shamelessly copying your fantastic ideas.)

Date: 2015-10-20 09:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I haven't had this much fun speculating since we all wondered what was wrong with Sam back in S6! I don't seriously think this will turn out to be the case, it just fascinates me that it could be! :D

Date: 2015-10-20 08:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amberdreams.livejournal.com
I am now taking this as canon, since the show left all that space for you to fill. *nods*
Edited Date: 2015-10-20 08:01 pm (UTC)

Date: 2015-10-21 02:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you! Playing in the gaps is fun! But yes, this was a big gap! :D

Date: 2015-10-21 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runedgirl.livejournal.com
I wish the canon Winchesters would have actual conversations just a fraction as much as your version!

Date: 2015-10-21 06:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Me too! Until that happens, I guess we fanfic writers will just have to keep filling in those blanks... :)

Date: 2015-10-24 10:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twnchesterangel.livejournal.com
Again, I'm extremely late to the party but holy crap did you, and Sam, blow my mind with this. What IF?? I love the sound of Sam's brain whirring in the morning. Hot damn. And I gotta say, I can see Sam tapping his toe to Eye Of The Tiger. That whole sequence was brilliant and very Sam-like. Lastly, it just doesnt get any better than your dialogue. This is an amazing tag and it's really making me think. Thanks for this!! *hugs*

Date: 2015-10-24 10:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Haha, thank you! I love the sound of Sam's brain whirring too! I love when we get some smart Sam. And those Eye of the Tiger lyrics just seemed so appropriate. So far this season I'm quite intrigued. :D

(This weekend two years ago we were at Chicon. Sob.)

Date: 2015-10-24 10:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twnchesterangel.livejournal.com
I knoooow. I can't believe it's been 2 years. The kids and I have been reminiscing (is that how you spell that???) quite a bit. It's like there's a dark cloud over us right now. Lol But they are wonderful memories. *weeps silently*

Date: 2015-10-28 08:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] strgazr04.livejournal.com
I never get tired of the way you write their voices. Especially Dean's. I can just picture his expression with the "that sentence made sense in my head" line. Made me smile.

Date: 2015-10-28 12:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Aww, thank you! That's such a lovely compliment. :D I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. :D

Date: 2015-10-31 01:15 pm (UTC)
kalliel: (Default)
From: [personal profile] kalliel
Aaaahhhhhhhh I love that image of everyone standing in the high school football arena with Eye of the Tiger blasting. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. And I love how that came to be, with Melissa having taught there and Sam's thoughts on what Superior's remaining population actually thought of him/his CDC cover. The way Dean drove up, the music, all of the music. Just MY GOD. And the way this all filters through Sam and Dean's conversation, music confined to the car, the enclosure of space so separate from that football field--the way Sam's thoughts jump between just him and Dean, and these huge cosmic questions.

I love all of this. <3333333

Date: 2015-11-01 12:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you. There were some nice little gaps for fanfic writers to play in in this episode (how did Sam cure the rest of the town?), and I took the opportunity for some shameless wish-fulfilment too, because I really wanted the boys to talk over that long car trip!
So glad you enjoyed. :D
From: [identity profile] livejournal.livejournal.com
User [livejournal.com profile] kalliel referenced to your post from [Fic] No Tricks, just Treats, some of which are tricky in themselves! (http://kalliel.livejournal.com/385338.html) saying: [...] by (Sam [POV]) Let there by light [...]

Date: 2015-11-14 07:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aerynsun5.livejournal.com
Ooo, loved this! The talking and the speculating and everything. Also, Dr. Who.

Deep down, Dean has always suspected that there was nothing inside him but darkness. I've introduced a few people to SPN recently. I'm not sure they'll ever get this.

Date: 2015-11-15 02:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zara-zee.livejournal.com
Thank you! So glad you enjoyed. Show is giving us so much to speculate about these days; it's wonderful! :D

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